A sixth grader came to my yoga class last week. And it was pretty much the best thing ever.
I was continuously astounded by her throughout the class. She totally brought it! She practiced with fierceness, beauty and fun. Besides how obviously awesome she was, I was also impressed by how fearless she was. When she came into class, she looked me right in the eye and told me how much she likes yoga (she learned it from her Art teacher–fabu!). A family member came with her and sat in on the class, and she never seemed embarrassed by that.
By the time I was this girl’s age, I was dieting. Swapping body commiseration with friends. Loathing being one of the tallest (that didn’t last long!) and biggest girls in my class. Forever embarrassed to be the fat daughter to a thin mother. There were times when I did enjoy moving my body (Clogging! Hey, we lived in Kentucky; what can I say? Except that I’m really thankful this was before the era of phone video cameras), but they were relatively few and far between. Gym class was the bane of my existence.
If I could go back and share what I’ve learned with my sixth grade self, it would be many of the lessons I learned from my new yogi friend:
- Fearlessness is the new black.
- Add some joy to every day.
- Sunshine salutes make everything better.
- If something doesn’t work for you, change it.
- Practicing most anything with a big ole smile is awesome.
- Your body is perfect because it’s yours.
After class last week, when I asked this sixth grade genius what she thought, she didn’t miss a beat in saying she liked it. I said “Oh, great! I hope I see you again soon!” She said, “I’m going to be at every yoga class.” (Apparently, she does not mess around.)
I really hope that’s true.
What would you say to your sixth grade (or other age) self?
This blog image is from The Art of Yoga Project, an incredible organization that brings yoga to teen girls in the juvenile justice system. I have loved this group for so long; I hope to one day do something like this in my community!
{ 15 comments… read them below or add one }
Brilliant. I too was dieting by I think age 6 (forget about sixth grade!). I think my messages to my 6th grade self would have to be something like—
Different= awesome
Fitting in is Relative
and love yourself and others, even the mean girls—don’t like them—but come at them from a place of loving kindness (something that I’m sure I didn’t understand as an 11 year old).
“Fitting in is relative.” Genius!!
What an awesome young yogini! When I was that age, every physical activity I was introduced to was either overtly competitive or felt that way to me, and I assumed I was not good enough. I wish I had yoga at that age so I could feel positively about my body and physical activity in general. What I would tell myself as a young dieting preteen is that anxiety, hatred, and stigma is not motivation. If I told someone else the things I was telling myself, it would be considered verbal abuse! I would also share that you don’t have to earn self-love through getting certain grades, looking a certain way, etc. Everyone deserves love.
So beautiful, Samantha! Thanks for sharing!
Love love love love this! My sixth grade self was wayyyyy to self-conscious to do anything remotely physical in public. I was all lanky arms and legs. Too tall and the first one with boobs. I would have showed up and sulked in the corner, wearing the baggiest clothes I could find, hoping no one would notice but secretly letting my monkey mind go wild with how everyone was judging me! I wish I would have started yoga so young — I probably would have started to love myself years earlier, and before I could hurt myself with eating disorders.
I’m with you, Racheal. I don’t know that I could have done it either, but how cool if so!
As a sixth grader (and pretty much up until my late 30′s) I was not involved in anything. Basically, if there was a chance my lack of coordination would be exposed or I would fail…I never tried it. So, I would tell my young self to go for it. It’s fun even if you aren’t totally cooridinated. You actually do get better the more you do something, and it’s awesome to see yourself improve. It’s okay if you fail, it’s not the end of the world, but don’t give up on EVERYTHING because you didn’t succeed at one thing. Now at 40, I’m riding a bicycle. My husband had to work with me on stopping. We had a whole session on braking and getting off the bike without crash landing. It was the best day ever.
I adore the story about you learning to ride a bike, Gale! What a fabulous day that must have been.
Oh, I love her. And you for recognizing and reveling in her glory. What a lovely story to start the week and good lessons to take with me along the way.
Thanks, Rosie! And thanks for all the incredible work you do with girls; I think it’s so important. You rock!
i was also the tallest girl in 6th grade! lasted exactly one summer and then my friend natalie grew about 8 inches. sigh, i am the same height at 41 as i was at 12.
in 6th grade i wasn’t dieting, but overall just feeling rotten. many, many contributing factors and not-so-great body image being just one.
what would i tell my 12 year old self?
-love you for you, not for who loves you.
-practice spending time in the present – and less time being sad about the past and worried about the future.
-find the joy in movement for movement’s sake, not how it can keep you thin.
-eat REAL food and enjoy the simplicity of flavors, textures
-it’s going to be ok.
I got chills when I read your list, Tams–so great. When I was reading it, I thought of another one I’d add to mine: try vegetables that don’t come from a can. I grew up eating canned vegetables and developed quite an aversion to (a) mushy food and (b) vegetables. Luckily, B subsided, but I’m still not a big fan of anything mushy!
(I’m pretty sure I’m the same height now that I was at 12, too.)
I love this post- so not me at 12yrs old, but I love how so many children have this openness and honesty about them.
Which is why I love working w children (preschoolers mind you, but it adds so much joy to my life).
Awesome lessons to learn no matter what your age!
I agree–always delighted by their insight!
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