Why Loving Your Body Starts with Awareness

When I signed up for my first teacher training, I was extremely reluctant. I was convinced that I was “too big” to do it. So while I was interested enough to set up a convo with the studio owner to learn more, I was fully expecting her to tell me (albeit gently) that this wasn’t the best time and maybe I should try back later when I was more fit.

So imagine my surprise when she not only didn’t say that, but she encouraged me to participate. I’d taken classes with her off and on for a couple years, so we weren’t strangers, but we also weren’t super close.

And then she said the thing that really blew me away: “You have really good awareness of your body.” 

Say Wha?

When I first started practicing yoga at home with Rodney Yee (no, I’m not rich. It was a VHS tape), my goal was just to move. The faster, the better. My entire intention was actually to check out and just get into “the zone.”

At the time, the zone was what I conceived of as being in my body. But in retrospect, I realize they’re not the same. In the zone, I’m in a space somewhat beyond my body — still using it, and not quite as in my mind as when I’m, say, worrying over what’s next on my to-do list. To me, the zone is almost more about being in the future than anything else. It’s moving through the poses, always ready for what’s next.

In my opinion, there is nothing inherently good or bad about being in this place. It’s just a location. And it was this ability to check out that kept me coming back to yoga for quite awhile, so I’m grateful for that.

Over time, though, with the encouragement of teachers and the repetition of practice, I started wanting to tweak my poses this way or that. As I did, I had to begin noticing what muscles in my feet and ankles activated when I was doing Tree. Or where my shoulders needed to be in Bridge.

Whole Body Consciousness

I’ve recently been reading a book by Steve Sisgold called What’s Your Body Telling You? Listening to Your Body’s Signals to Stop Anxiety, Erase Self-Doubt and Achieve True Wellness.

In this book, he talks about how much wisdom our body has — and not just metaphorically. He points to studies that show how much our physiology is affected by our emotions, how muscle memory isn’t just a cutesy saying.

One of the main keys Sigold suggests for accessing the body’s wisdom is tuning into the body. In other words: awareness.

How To

As I was reading the book, I was struck by how familiar it felt in some ways. I’ve had practice becoming aware of my body primarily because of yoga. This is actually what I think the key to the connection between yoga and body image is: developing the ability to become aware of, and feel, your body.

For many of us (myself for sure included), this is absolutely revolutionary. We’ve spent years (and even decades) escaping our bodies to escape our problems. So to begin to feel the body, however slowly and hesitantly, really has the potential to crack something open inside us.

From there, things unfurl — albeit sometimes slower than we might like.

Awareness & Loving Your Body

Little did I know all those years ago when I started practicing, or later when I spoke with my would-be teacher, that awareness would be such a keystone for me.

For awhile, I’ve known that loving your body is rarely a first step. It’s hard to skip from loathing to loving; it feels too much like two ends of a spectrum. And even if you’re not all the way out on loathing but somewhere in between, like mild disregard — or even neutrality — it’s still a bit of a leapfrog move to get to loving.

I thought that the interim step was accepting. And I still think that’s true; it is an interim step. It’s just not the first step, which I’d been conflating it to be.

Instead, I think the first step is awareness.

The more we can wake up to our bodies, the better chance we have of waking up to our feelings. And with both body and feelings conscious, we can begin the work of sorting through what’s what as we move a little further down the spectrum toward body love.

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