The Curvy Seven is a monthly series featuring super-cool curvy yogis from all over. This month’s post is from the oh-so-fab Stacey Beth Shulman.
1. What’s Your Yoga Origin Story?
Yoga found me more than 10 years ago, when I was taking DansKinetics classes (now known as Kripalu YogaDance). The teacher would lead us through simple postures as a warm up and cool down during the class, and I really enjoyed it. In addition, I was taking a lot of step aerobics. My body was probably the smallest it had been in quite a while, but I couldn’t walk more than a block without experiencing terrible pain in my calves. By that time the dance classes had ended, so I found a yoga class nearby and added it into my weekly routine, figuring that it would help alleviate the pain.
It did help. A lot. But the studio didn’t feel supportive to me. If I wanted props I had to ask before class started, and the teacher would go to a closet in the farthest office and find them for me. During one class, the teacher seemed to become frustrated because I needed help getting into a shoulderstand and she didn’t seem to understand why I couldn’t just roll up into the posture. The schedule changed at some point to something less convenient for me, and I decided to stop taking yoga classes.
When I stopped doing yoga, the pain in my legs returned. I quit taking aerobics classes altogether, as well as doing any other form of movement or exercise. I was furious at myself for stopping and at my body for betraying me, and found myself deep in a cycle of emotional eating. I soon became pretty depressed and subsequently gained a significant amount of weight.
A few years later, I saw a small ad for a yoga class on Sunday nights at a new studio and decided to go. It was pretty scary to walk in feeling so miserable, but from the minute I entered, I knew I was home. There was a big pile of blankets, tons of blocks, and a basket of yoga ties right there in plain view for anyone to use without asking. The teacher, William Hufschmidt, was funny and thoughtful and kind. And he played his guitar during Savasana, the final rest pose. I went back the next week, and the week after that. Little by little, I started coming to more classes. And little by little, I began to notice subtle changes in the way I felt, moved, ate, and took care of myself. I felt a glimmer of hope that I could, one day, actually live in the body I have rather than constantly fighting against it.
I entered my 200 hour teacher training program on Labor Day weekend of 2008 and finished in February of 2009, after exploring a lot of teacher training options both in Atlantaand elsewhere. One program director told me I had a ‘yoga heart, but not a yoga body’ and suggested I pursue training in meditation instead. I was devastated. When I learned that my teacher’s teacher, Yoganand Michael Carroll, offered a yoga teacher training in Atlanta, I jumped at the chance. I knew that Megan Garcia was one of his students, and I was excited to have the opportunity to study with him too. During those 6 months I learned how much I could endure both on and off the mat! I emerged feeling strong in my body and confident of my teaching abilities.
Today I teach 9 classes a week and sometimes even more! I’m working towards my 500 hour yoga teacher certification, as well as pursuing certification in Yoga Therapy. I have a small office where I offer private yoga sessions and a yoga-based bodywork called Positional Release. I practice yoga as much as I can, and enjoy watching my body continue to evolve as I change and grow as a person, a teacher, and a healer.
2. Who’s your favorite curvy icon?
Michael Hayes of Buddha Body Yoga rocks my socks. He teaches a flowing style of yoga using a Yoga Wall that is just amazing. I got to spend an hour with him at his office in Manhattan last October, just before going to Kripalu for a workshop. We had a super fun practice on his wall, including Sirsasana – full headstand, and shared our favorite tips and tricks with each other. His ingenuity and generosity are what make him my favorite curvy icon.
3. What yoga pose do you love? And loathe?
I love most any pose that stretches the psoas, but I especially adore Ustrasana – camel pose. I struggled with it for a long time until one night in class my body spontaneously popped up into the posture. Since then, I have always felt really strong and serene when I’m in it. It’s still a challenge because my flexibility varies somewhat from day to day, but I always enjoy how much it lengthens the front of my body and opens my heart so deeply.
What pose do I loathe? Sukhasana – easy pose. Don’t let the name fool you! My hamstrings tend to be short and tight, making sitting on the floor a nightmare to begin with. I have learned how to use props to make this posture more bearable, and with the right combination of support, I can maintain Sukhasana for a significant amount of time. Lately in my own practice, I’ve been drawn to postures that lengthen and strengthen my hamstrings, and I can already see a difference in how I feel in this pose. It makes me wonder if, in a year from now, my answer will be the same!
4. What advice would you share with other curvy yogis?
Take your time to find the right teachers for you – they are out there. Don’t give up, even if everyone else is doing an arm balance, and you’re doing a face plant. Practice yoga naked every once in awhile. Handstands and headstands change your perspective. Props make postures possible. If you close your eyes, nobody else can see you. Respect your edges. Give yourself permission to try something new. After a hard class, Epsom salt and arnica are your best friends. Honor your body with meaningful activity, peaceful rest, yummy food, and enough water. Breathe. Relax. Feel. Watch. Allow.
5. What’s your favorite yoga resource?
I am a self-described Prop Queen, and to that end, I love http://www.YogaAccessories.com. Their bolsters are the best, and come in a range of shapes and sizes. I have a bolster I purchased from them several years ago that I schlep with me to every class! You can also get great deals on blocks and other handy things. I keep an eye out for whatever is in their buy one, get one free sale. Chances are, if I need it in one hand, I’ll need it in the other, so having two makes it that much easier to incorporate props in my practice.
6. What quote inspires you?
“My beloved child, break your heart no longer. Every time you judge yourself you break your own heart. You stop feeding on the love which is the wellspring of your vitality. The time has come. Your time. To live, to celebrate, and to see the goodness that you are. You, my child, are divine. You are pure. You are sublimely free. You are God in disguise, and you are always perfectly safe. Do not fight the dark, just turn on the light, and breathe into the goodness that you are.” – Swami Kripalu (Bapuji)
7. Wild card: anything else you would like to share?
Yoga is not about losing weight. It’s about gaining acceptance of yourself, as you are, in the moment. Even if you’re watching the sweat drip from your forehead onto your mat while your bra strap is hanging out and your adductors are on fire, but you can’t do anything about it because you’re in the most amazing expression of Mandukasana – frog pose that you’ve ever experienced in your life. Yeah, especially then.
__________________
Stacey Beth Shulman is a Yoga Teacher and Yoga Therapist in Atlanta,GA. When she is not on the mat, she loves reading, cooking, painting, dancing the 5 Rhythms, spending time with her partner of 12 years, and playing with their cat, who gets only mildly annoyed.
You can find her online at www.curvyyogini.com, stacey beth shulman (Facebook) and @curvyyogini (Twitter).
{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }
Thanks Stacey for sharing your story. I remembered the quote that you had from Bapuji, it sounded familiar and I realised at then end why. I had taken Kripalu yoga and our teacher used to recite this poem, verse. How sweet and true. The use of props is so helpful for those taking yoga who are needing a little assistance in attaining postures with ease and comfort. I too also bring my props with me to yoga classes where they aren’t provides. I especially love my bolster. Right now I’m taking classes where they have all the props so I just bring my mat and water bottle. the classes are small no more than 10 max so a lot of atttention is given to students and alternatives are given if a certian pose is not appropiate for you. I also had gone to Kripalu over 11 years ago and loved the Dansinetic classes at lunch with the Kripalu drummers. I had taken a viniyoga class with Gary Kraftsow when I was their. I’m from Canada and I always wanted to go to Kripalu to experience the place. It was so amazing!!! I also love Judith Hanson Lasater classes Rest and renewal as you use props and do restorative poses. I really think Yoga theraphy and self acceptance of where you are in life/pose right now and just sit and be with it is such a soft and gentle approach. I wish you all the best in your pursuit of attaining Yoga theraphy certification. Again thank you for sharing your story.
Hi Stacey and Anna,
I have heard a lot of horror stories similar to Stacey being told she “had a yoga mind but not a yoga body”. A curvy teacher I know was told that a studio had no classes for someone with her body type, without even seeing her practice. I feel so blessed to have gone to my first yoga class at my current studio, which is incredibly open and nurturing. When I was wondering whether I could do teacher training, my teacher was so supportive, and has never suggested that my weight would hold me back. Hearing about stories like Stacey’s, it really strikes me how brave it is to keep searching for the right teacher, teacher training, studio, etc. So many people would never find the strength to go back to yoga if they have a negative experience. It really reinforces how important it is to show the world that curvy yogis can be an important part of the yoga community. The advice to keep searching for the right teacher and right environment to practice is great. Thanks for the good work!
Wonderful post, Stacey! Thank you for sharing. I actually found your words so inspiring that I was mulling over the issue of yoga and health and size all day. Alas, my own post on the subject involves a lot more expletives and sarcasm.
The comment about your ‘yoga heart’ will stay with me for a long time. It’s such a perfect example of how the issue of weight and size effects the yoga community, as well as the kind of spaces we create for practitioners.
{ 1 trackback }