This is such an exciting week of body positivity! In addition to Love Your Body Day on Thursday, this whole week is Fat Talk Free Week!
Matching Words and Ideals
The idea behind Fat Talk Free Week (FTFW) is to not talk negatively about your body. I’m sure you know what I’m talking about — “Does this make me look fat?” ”My thighs look huge in these pants!” and on and on.
When I first brought some awareness to my negative body language, I made a concerted effort not to say it out loud. And that was an awesome first step for me because it helped me cultivate some consciousness around my language and how I was spreading a message I didn’t agree with — that we have something to apologize for about our bodies.
Quick detour here: I think the work that FTFW does is important because many people do use the word “fat” disparagingly to describe their bodies. However, I think that reclaiming the word as a neutral descriptor is just as important. That’s why I want to focus this post on the many different ways we talk about and are in relationship with our bodies.
For example, as I practiced changing how I talked about my body, I rarely ever said anything negative about it out loud. But did the inner dialogue quell?
Well, yes and no.
Yes because the negative words were less on the forefront of my mind. No because, well, there’s a lot more at work than words here. And, of course, the FTFW campaign wouldn’t suggest that’s not the case. FTFW is a stepping stone, and I think it’s important to remember that. If you, like me, have directed a considerable amount of your anxiety, vulnerability you didn’t want exposed and raw emotions at your body instead of through, out, or otherwise helpfully processed, it can take a lot of work to find your way.
The NeverEnding Story
This may sound like depressing news, but as someone who is walking this path with you (about six years in at this point — or twenty, depending on how you look at it), I can say that it’s not. It’s actually liberation, pure and simple. This isn’t about steeling your will to loveyourbodynomatterwhat. Rather, it’s about opening and opening and opening again. I love this quote from Gil Hedley to that point:
The tension and holding in our bodies reflect the tension and holding in our lives-at-large. To expand and open our bodies, it helps to open up your life a bit. This will mean something different to everybody of course. And if you open up your life a lot, your body may change so much you’ll hardly recognize yourself~ It’ll still be you though. And once you’ve done all that, you’re still not done. There’s always more.
Changing the body will also mean different things for all of us — and much, if not most, of it may be internal. Loving your body doesn’t have a destination — it’s a constantly shifting process, and you uncover new levels, depths and breadths in yourself along the way.
Entry Points
While there is no end point, there are as many ways to get started (or come back) as there are people on this journey. Some possible forays are below:
- Sign the Fat Talk Free pledge
- Participate in the Love Your Body Day blog carnival
- Sign Rosie Molinary’s Body Warrior pledge (and get in on a great drawing!)
Want more Curvy Yoga on being fat talk free? Check out last year’s post, and also check out “Freedom from Fat Talk” in The Magazine of Yoga.
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YES! love this.
Hooray for Fat Talk Free Week! We at Eat With Joy are all about interrupting images and talk that contribute to body and food anxiety and making room for joy: http://eatwithjoy.org
I think reclaiming language is more the issue for me. I have a big ass. So what? My husband likes it. I like it too. I’m not as fond of my fat thighs, but that is because it is hard to find pants that work with my proportions. When I got married the seamstress helping me with my top commented on how it would “camouflage” my hips. I’m thinking “why would I want to do that?” Just last week I commented on my butt and a saleslady did the same thing, as though it was something to hide. My body is real. I shouldn’t have to talk about it in false language to make other people comfortable.
just this morning i woke up, looked in the mirror angled sideways, and said, “god damn that’s a foine ass!”
more power to us with positive talk!
I have been bemoaning ny hips for a couple of weeks. Sheesh,I’m not even sure why. The truth is they are really not so bad. I’m going to try and be mindful and send more love to them.
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